13-“It Is What It Is” - Or Is It? Why Anything Can Change Even When It Feels Set In Stone
Introduction
Sometimes there are moments when you face a situation where you don’t believe the outcome will be anything other than one specific thing, and the automatic response tends to be the phrase, “Well, it is what it is.” Usually, these situations are ones that feel a little disappointing or mediocre. For example, you had a wonderful day planned, but the weather turned unexpectedly and forced you to cancel your plans. Or you go out to buy food, only to see the price has gone up—and, of course, you need to pay it anyway. These are just two examples of many that can easily end with the phrase, “It is what it is” — or is it?
Where It Comes From
It’s not what you say but why you say it. What is the emotion you feel when you say that phrase? In many cases, this saying can be misconstrued as a sign of acceptance of the situation. However, more often than not, it’s a subtle way of giving up hope for change and submitting to the situation. Notice if you tend to take an extra deep breath or sigh right before or as you say, “It is what it is.” That’s a pretty good indication that you’ve resigned yourself to the circumstance. The phrase sits on a similar level as “I give up”, “It doesn’t matter” and “Whatever”.
You Are The Change You Seek
Just because the situation around you isn’t changing doesn’t mean you can’t. To feel better about any circumstance—no matter how “normal” or routine it might seem—you need to change your perspective. There are endless ways to view and experience a situation beyond the one you’ve always known. Ask yourself: How would I prefer to see and feel about this situation? From there, decide what your new truth is going to be.
Even if no one else you know shares the same perspective, stick to what feels good for you. As long as it uplifts you, that’s all that matters. With that one small change in thought, you’re raising your energy and improving how you feel. Let everyone else feel how they choose, and appreciate yourself for choosing what’s true to you instead of following the crowd.
Conclusion
In the end, the situation may stay the same, but you’ve created a different kind of change. You’ve shifted from “It is what it is” to “It can be anything I choose it to be.” That is empowerment, originality, and dedication to taking care of your mental and emotional well-being—all from one simple change. It starts with just one shift, and before you know it, you’ll be applying this approach to other areas of your life.
Helpful Affirmation
“I choose to see my experiences from a ‘feel-good’ point of view.”
Try This Today
Pick anything in your life or society that feels like “it is what it is,” and consider your current feelings about it. Then, ask yourself how you’d rather feel and come up with a perspective that supports this shift.
For example:
Paying taxes — Most of us aren’t thrilled about it, but “it is what it is.”
Instead of feeling annoyed, frustrated or tired, I’d rather feel content with paying taxes since it doesn’t seem to be going away anytime soon. So, I choose to believe that I always have enough money to cover all my expenses, including taxes, and in return, I acquire amazing food and supplies that nourish and care for my body. This way of thinking creates a higher, more positive feeling than my original frustration, which (like the food I purchase) also helps support my well-being.
Wishing you love & liberation,
Janette
